Remember

By -
No Comments

I get back
To my home which isn’t really home,
And it’s cold,
And it’s dark,
And it’s only five o’clock
And it feels right
But in the same instance it doesn’t feel right,

And so I put back on my coat and my scarf and my boots,
And I leave my home which isn’t home
And I put on that music which has no timescale,
Which reminds me of last decade and last year and last week.
I feel my hot breath against my scarf,
And I kick the leaves with the toe of my boot.

And I’m fifteen,
And I’m angry and sad,
And so terribly, terribly misunderstood,
And I want to talk,
I need to talk,
But there’s no-one to talk to
And really, there’s nothing to talk about.

I hear the bangs and the crackles,
And there’s a shiver down my spine,
And I’m eleven.
And I’m wondering why my sister is scared,
For what’s to be afraid of
In some bright lights and loud noises?
The smell of the air fills me up
The sulphur, the fire,

And I’m eight,
And it’s dark,
And it’s smoky,
And it hurts my chest,
But it’s still bright, and crisp, and so rejuvenating,
And who needs to breathe anyway?

I stop, and a red burst of light illuminates the path,
And I crane my neck,
And I’m five.
And everyone expects me to be scared,
But what is there to be afraid of
In some bright lights and loud noises?

My breath rises in front of me,
And the sky threatens me with snow
But it seems reluctant to commit
Like it did last year.

And I’m eighteen.
And I’ve just heard, and I’m numb,
And I’m shocked but not quite,
But I’ve got no time, and I’m going out
But I’m not quite ready
And suddenly it hurts,
And I choke,
And I fight tears which aren’t quite ready,
And I sit.

I sit,
And I’m exhilarated, and I’m happy,
But in the same instance I’m angry, and I’m numb
And I blink back the tears which still aren’t quite ready.

And so I go back,
To my home which isn’t really home,
And I take off my boots and my scarf and my coat
On my favourite day of the year
(Which, in the same instance, is my least favourite day of the year),
And I wait
Until November 6th.

GOT SOMETHING TO SAY?

All Articles