Right, so for a long while now I have been away doing things, important things that will benefit me and my future goals and aspirations. To be more specific I have been in a year at university, a Foundation Course in hopes of getting the grades I need so I can get into the university degree I wish to be a part of for the next year. So I haven’t been doing much of what I normally would do during my free time. Playing computer/console games, watching the latest anime shows, heck I haven’t even been able to play as big a part of the Wicid Editorial Team as I normally do or write articles for the site due to how busy things are. But after today, I think it’s worth taking a little time out of my busy schedule to share how I am feeling right now.
How do I feel you ask? Angry, depressed, confused, mainly those three, and why is this? People. I’m not dodging the question here, the answer is people. Now, I’m sure those who happen to read my article can guess, or to those who know me personally know me well enough to know that me interacting with people on a daily basis is definitely a touchy subject. I’m not good with people, that’s the way it has been, that’s the way it always will be. I’ve improved since I was younger, and I continue to do so, but for the most part being Asperger’s has its disadvantages, and talking is the main one. So because of this, I only speak to people when being spoken to, and even then I reply in ways that make a conversation turn awkward, and I never intend to do that, believe me.
But onto the topic in discussion, I am currently starting my Final Major Project in my university course where I have chosen to talk about the four topics of the United Kingdom: England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland. Now, I have time to decide if I want to stick to giving myself more work than necessary by working on these four, or if I should narrow it down to one or two of the countries. But to do that, I need research and information about the countries, and sadly enough the internet won’t help me alone. I need people’s opinions, I need to know what they think when I mention these countries to them. So I go to Pontypridd, and I ask as many people I can for the next hour or, awkwardly sit down for a few minutes trying to find out how to talk to the next people without coming across as invading their personal space since I don’t know them and most likely will never see them again.
The hour passes, I have asked a good number of people for help with some questions. How many of those people do you think answered my questions? One, and out of how many? Oh, I’d say about fifteen. And that doesn’t include the ones that were couples or groups of people I asked, so really it was more than fifteen, say about two dozen or so. How ignorant. Yes, I’m calling them out of it, those two dozen or so people were plain and simply ignorant, and the worst part about it is, they were well over their twenties, maybe even in their fifties and sixties.
I understand that people have their routines and plans when they are going out and when they do, they don’t want to be distracted from their days by complete strangers, that I get. When I have been in Cardiff and even Ponty sometimes, people would try to stop me and I would admittedly do the same thing, because I have goals I want to do in the day (maybe I have made my article redundant by saying that, but I digress). But here’s the thing, those people have goals too, I had a goal when I went to Ponty today. I needed people’s help by answering their personal opinion on the four countries that make up the United Kingdom, yet for whatever reason no one but that lovely woman would answer me (I doubt you are reading this or know of my existence, but I thank you so much Miss Nice Lady! Kisses for you!). Even the people who were sitting down looking half asleep for the most part, they wouldn’t have any of it.
Going back to when I walk past people in Cardiff or Ponty wanting to talk to me about things like child starvation or cruelty toward animals or whatever campaign they are supporting, I don’t talk to them because I just don’t have the money to support these causes, you know since they usually ask you to, like, pay a pound or something or fill out a form for them. I mean I’d hear them out normally, but if money is involved, and it usually is, I don’t because I don’t want them to get their hopes up and then go around and say: ‘Yeah, not interested.’ That would make them feel bad for wasting their time with me, and I’d also feel bad for getting their hopes up, and I don’t like making people feel bad. But these people in Ponty today, I bet they felt exactly the same wayâ€¦no, no I really think they couldn’t care less.
Maybe it’s because they were with a loved one and didn’t want to look stupid in front of them. Well, you both already looked stupid for not wanting to help someone who clearly needed it. Maybe they weren’t in a particularly good mood that time. Well I doubt you knew what a good mood is unless someone mentioned the phrase on last night’s soap. ‘Oh a good mood isi? I heard them talk about that on Corrie last night I did!’ Maybe because I was asking questions for my uni that you thought you couldn’t help. Maybe they were indeed too busy, except they wouldn’t be because they would be in their sixties probably doing absolutely nothing with their lives.
But that’s just the older public, what about the younger people, what did they have to say. Well, in all honesty, I didn’t ask a single one. And here’s my reason. We all know young people and teenagers go through those rebellious stages in life, thinking they’re all cool and what not with their friends, wanting to be more important than the person they are talking to, and the same goes for that person who is being talked to, or at least most young people anyway. Now imagine someone like me, someone wanting to advance my career in life, walking up to a bunch of kids who are throwing, like, weird little popping firework things, on the floor at each other (I don’t need to imagine it, I saw them doing it in Ponty today. Why is stuff like that even being sold in the world?). Do you think they’d listen? No, in fact, they’d probably throw those things at my feet and try to take my lunch money or something! Young kids are scary, and annoying, andâ€¦ scary. And ignorant!
You can expect young people not to answer these sorts of questions for the main reasons. Not knowing enough about the topic being asked to them, and the fact that most teenagers start out being flat out ignorant of other people in the community. So for me to find this out about people in their twenties, forties, their elderly years even, it’s justâ€¦ well, how! How do we live in a world where you can’t spend at least two minutes out of your twenty four hour days to hear them out. You may learn something new, make you think about things that you normally don’t think about. Bring something different to your ordinary lives. Maybe we can start with young people, so the next generation of young adults like me who ask questions for their final major projects can actually get answers that may help them, even if it’s not what they are looking for, at least we talked to them about it.
But for now, I’ll just stay hidden away looking for my answers on the internet and look up answers on what makes the United Kingdom the country that it is. Oh hey, I thought of something! We are all ignorant! HAH! I guess this whole experience taught me something after all.
Related Article: Radical Rant: Youth Limits