Wrestling Review: Attack! Pro Wrestling The MistleTour 2016 Bristol (18/12/2016)

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Another Attack! review, which means you should expect quite the show, and dang, what a show it was to close off the year for the promotion. Before I even got in the cue outside was gigantic, I’d say even more than the Cardiff show from before. And the crowd definitely had a slight edge of rowdiness in this show.

Now much like the Cardiff show, there was a bonus match that took place before the actual main show, so I’ll cover that first.

Also just as a heads up, I initially started writing this article a few days after the show, but then I’ve had Uni deadlines and other things taking over my spare time for me to post this on time. And because of that, there’s a certain point where the detail of the matches is not as in-depth as the rest since I didn’t have my notes with me. So keep that in mind going forward. But anyway, onto that bonus match!

Bonus Match

‘Raving’ Danny Jones defeats Elijah Dahl

Before the match began, we had Shay as the ref, and wow, not a single person was happy to see him. They booed him louder than the Cathays lot did, and that’s kind of shocking considering his turn happened in the Cardiff area and not in Bristol. Granted a good selection of people came from the previous show as well, but we weren’t in Wales here and they just did NOT like Shay. Anyway, we see the appearance of Elijah Dahl, only this time, we get ‘Raving’ Danny Jones without the Love Making Demon. But even without his good buddy, Danny held his own as he usually does. He of course had a whistle on hand to do some more shenanigans with it, but the good kind of course, the kind that made the people happy. But Elijah wanted to stop his enjoyment with his vicious offence and a few impressive manoeuvres. Danny was able to fight back with his just as impressive hybrid offence, and managed to hit his Pumphandle Facebuster finisher for the pinfall victory. He danced his way to the back and everyone felt even more ready for the official show to start.

A minute or so after, we got the official Attack! opening with Jim Lee coming out to the same Christmas theme from the Cathays show the night before. People chanted ‘One more match!’ at Jim again (maybe most of these people WERE at Walkabout last month, not the kids obviously since it IS a nightclub). Shay appeared to be the ref and people drowned him in boos with chants of ‘We hate Shay!’ and ‘No one likes you!’ which he shrugged off. Jim Lee then got people cheering for some ‘Christmas! Wrestling! FUN!’ and you can only imagine what happened next…

Opening Match

‘Elf Ligero’ (El Ligero) defeats Sergeant Travis Banks w/ Chief Deputy Damien Dunne

The Anti-Fun Police appeared as Sergeant Banks was opening the show against the Mexican Sensation, El Ligero, or rather, ‘Elf Ligero’ for tonight as the mask marvel appeared in an elf costume with two bobbles danking off the two horns on his mask. The match started off in a comedic fashion with one of Elf’s bobbles falling off at the start and Banks stamping on the other that fell. There was a sequence where Banks was headlocking Ligero but the later escaped and Banks still thought he had him in a headlock. Ligero replaced himself with Shay who was now in the ongoing headlock, to the crowd’s delight. Ligero had some presents for Banks he brought with him at one point. One was a can of Fosters, which caused the crowd to mock his New Zealand heritage by calling him ‘Australian’. From what I hear you DO NOT confuse the two! It’s like calling someone from Northern Ireland, regular Irish. Or someone from Wales English! YOU! NEVER! DO! THAT! He was also given a carby snack, which he threw into the crowd. Ligero got serious after this, taking off the elf outfit and got more offense in. Not before making Damien & Travis kiss under mistletoe of course. Kind of makes up for Love Making Demon not being there.

The offense  between the two involved dirty tactics from AFP and the numbers game when Shay was not paying attention, and even a few moves from Travis that you could call, dare I say it… ‘fun?’ But Ligero was able to fight back with some quick paced action and high risk moves that caught Banks off guard on many occasions. In the end, it was Ligero’s finishing Springboard DDT that got him the pinfall victory.

Rob Van Drew (EC Drew / Drew Parker) w/ ‘Raving’ Danny Jones defeats Martin Kirby

The ever adored Martin Kirby gets a nice reaction from the crowd, while Drew Parker- sorry, EC Drew- SORRY, RVD! Aka Rob Van Drew! (a parody on the ECW wrestler Rob Van Dam) It was a bit odd to see Danny Jones randomly accompanying Drew, but he did it to be his hype man to some sense. But more on that in a bit.

As you’d expect with Drew parodying ECW wrestlers, his movset in this match was very similar to that of Rob Van Dams, doing many flips which came across as more natural to Drew in this match up. He even used a steel chair in a few moments in relation to Dam’s use of the steel chair in his career. Kirby was as impressive as he always is, but sadly in this occasion, it was a Five-Star Frog Splash that got Drew the pinfall victory.

After just as Drew and Danny were celebrate, Danny grabs Drew and hits him with his Pumphandle Facebuster finisher, which I somewhat expected as the reason for him being out with Drew. And since the 24:7 Title can change hands at ANY TIME, Danny took advantage of this after the match and actually got the three count. WE HAVE A NEW 24:7 CHAMPION!

Attack! 24:7 Championship Match(es)

‘Raving’ Danny Jones defeats Rob Van Drew (Drew Parker) to become the NEW 24:7 Champion!

This is Danny’s second reign as 24:7 Champion which the could were mixed with, but this celebration didn’t last long as Kirby attacked him after in an attempt to win the belt for himself. But after a finishing Fame-asser, Drew threw him out of the win, and got the three count himself!

Rob Van Drew (Drew Parker) defeats ‘Raving’ Danny Jones to regain the 24:7 Championship!

After this, Drew dashes to the back and the craziness has ended… for now.

Bird & Boar (Mike Bird & Wild Boar) defeats FSU (Attack! Pro Wrestling Champion: Eddie Dennis and Mark Andrews)

This match was going to be a good one, and I wasn’t disappointed since it featured four of the best welsh born wrestlers to come out of our country. FSU were much more liked than their challengers, but that didn’t bother Bird & Boar. If anything, the people didn’t like them more as they got all buddy-buddy with Shay. ‘I like this guy!’, said Bird as the crowd showed their disapproval. People were taking the mick with Shay still being in school while Eddie made a quippy remark and both him and Shay having the holidays off. Eddie’s apparently a primary school teacher for his day job. The more you know! The match started out with some tech between Eddie and Mike, and the both teams were executing some nice double team manoeuvres. Bird and Boar were able to turn this around in their favour with some attitude and aggression respectively. The people weren’t fond of either of them as they had quite a lot of ‘OOOOOOH Mike Bird/Wild Boar, we hate you’ songs’ and ‘sucks!’ chants to both of them. It didn’t help that during their beatdown on Mark, Shay was holding Eddie back MANY TIMES while they were using cheap tricks. There was a small comedic moment with Boar throwing Mark into Mike’s foot in the corner, and then Mike doing the same thing with Boar. But Boar isn’t exactly the tallest of competitors, so he had trouble getting his foot up. Mike had to forcibly stretch it up, but during this time, Mark was able to hit Bird into his partner’s foot instead. Eddie would help get the momentum back to his team with his heavy hitting and powerful offence, even doing his Samoan Drop/Fallaway Slam combination to both Bird and Boar. Mark was also to help get back into the match with his well known fast paced, high risk action. Bird & Boar at one point hit FSU’s finishing move to try and get the win on Andrews, but it didn’t work as ‘White Lightning’ had a bit more fight in him. After attempting their Revenge finish on Eddie, only the Gutbuster hit as Eddie moved out from Boar’s splash. Eddie and Mark hit their Next Stop Driver/Diving Stomp finish, but the pin was broken up. In the end, Bird and Boar fully executed their ‘Mrs Pattersons Revenge’ finish to get the pinfall victory on the Attack! Pro Champion. The people weren’t happy with this end to the first half of the show as Bird signalled for going for a title again, but this time he made a ‘bowling’ motion. So could he be after than more than just Eddie’s title? Only time will tell.

Next was the interval and during this time, it was also the Secret Santa raffle to all of those who brought gives with them to partake in it. I believe the total number of people were FIFTY ONE! So there was a lot of interest in those who bought something. Even some of the Attack people took part, such as Jim, one of the cameramen, and even some of the other wrestlers, like Mark, Danny, Nixon Newell and Morgan Webster. There may have been more people, but I had was in the toilet at the start of it, so I may have missed a few names. There was of course the main Attack! raffle after the interval finished, and I managed to partake in this one, though I wasn’t able to win anything. But unlike the rest of the Attack! audience, I didn’t throw my tickets into the ring at rage since I was nowhere near that salty. Never change Attack fans…

Just a heads up, this is wear the review will be very hazy as it has been over a month since I went to the actual show, and I lost my notes while doing other work. So I’ll do my best to make the rest of the show sound as great as it has been so far.

6 Man Tag

Tyler Bate & Bowl-a-Rama (Splits McPins & ‘Fat Katt’ Lloyd Katt) defeats Nixon Newell & #CCK (Chris Brookes & Mondai Lykos)

This match was a bit of a hectic one as well. Nixon & CCK attacked while Bate and Bowl-a-Rama were hyping up the crowd, but the fan favourites quickly turned it against their advisories. The match did have impressive displays of tag team mastery by the teams of #CCK and Bowl-a-Rama, while Tyler was his strongman, charismatic self and Nixon was quite the opposite, being very aggressive to everyone she was faced against. The match’s intensity gets getting higher and higher as things went on, with each team pulling out many different tactics that had them all on the verge of victory. However it was ultimately a bit of miscommunication by Nixon as she ended up hitting big moves on both Brookes and Lykos that ended up costing their team the match, which the crowd didn’t seem to mind as they celebrated with Tyler and Bowl-a-Rama.

After the favourites went to the back, CCK started arguing with Nixon in the ring, belittling her to the point where she had enough. She headbutted both in them in the chest and then proceeded to throw out her mouth guard and get rid of her tied up hair-band, signalling the return of the once beloved Nixon, and people could see this as well. She attempted to hit her Welsh Destroyer, but CCK managed to escape before this. Nixon did get on the mic after to say how sick she is of both of them. She then went to mention ‘recent rumours online’ about her and her ‘future’. Some of which are TRUE, some of which are UNTRUE… but now matter what happens in the near future, she vows that she will ‘beat the *BLEEP* out of both of them!’ I don’t want to mention what those rumours are relating to, but I’m sure wrestling fans in general can put two and two together. Or do a google search, the online reports are out there of course. Maybe I’ll write a review on it if it does come true or not, who knows? Either way, crews and a few fans started to throw in some drinks and…. Sweets or something edible? Nixon drank from one and ate some stuff with a smile on her face as her old upbeat theme music played again.

Main Event

‘Snow/No Holds Barred’ Match

Ryan Smile defeats Chief Deputy Damien Dunne

While this may wasn’t for any championship gold, the rivalry between these two was much bigger than any championship match. While this match was meant to take place at the Seriously PPV Tie-In Event, Ryan was injured at the time and had to vacate his old 24:7 Championship. But now with no title on the line, the focus on this match was a battle between two friends.

The match itself was just as insane as you’d expect from a No Holds Barred Main Event from Attack! There were moves executed onto carboard present on the stage and on inflatable snowmen. There many high risk and heavy hitting moves by Ryan Smile, and even more devastating blows and heavy hits by Damien. As the match went on, Banks would appear to help his Anti-Fun Police head. But just as things were looking the best for Ryan, music played and the Attack! audience went electric when they saw the beloved pink plush ‘Skat Monkey’ dancing on the stage. And then we see someone in an elf costume enter the ring with Banks. This guy was around the crowd all night, and we know now that it was Sebastian Radclaw! He attacked and helped hold off Banks, which in turn helped Smile get the advantage over his former friend and get the victory!

After the match Ryan celebrated in the ring as the people in the crowd were overjoyed and many of the favourite faces of Attack came out to celebrate with Ryan. He got onto the mic, and while the exact words escape me, he thanks everyone who supported him, all those he considers his friends and the other talent, and Attack! Pro Wrestling, and how things will only be bigger and better going forward. Christmas tunes started to play as everyone in the ring and the crowd started to dance, the first of the songs being Fairytale of New York, which is definitely the best Christmas song, I will fight you I you think otherwise. There were other songs next where people still proceeded to dance along to them, with there even being a massive conga line with everyone, wrestlers and fans alike.

What an appropriate way for Attack! to close out 2016, with some good old fashion FUN! If you all want to be part of the magic going forward, check up on Attack’s social media link which I will include below. Here’s to an even bigger, better, weirder and more wonderful new year for everyone at Attack! Pro Wrestling!

Attack! Pro Wrestling Social Media Links

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/ATTACKprowrestling

Twitter – @ATTACKWrestling

Instragram – attackwrestling

Website – http://attackprowrestling.co.uk/

On-Demand – http://attackprowrestling.co.uk/attack-on-demand/4591917192

Store – http://attackprowrestling.bigcartel.com/

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