I set myself a challenge to write down 25 things that annoy me in life, in people and In general – it was not difficult.
1)Owning an asthma inhaler is hipster all of a sudden? You have an oxygen cannister, I’m well jel!
2)Oh you’re 14 and you got mashed on the weekend, what did you do drink your Ribena too fast?
3)The banks are in debt, thousands have lost their job, but screw it, sue your bank for PPI refunds!
4)Come on down to DFS for our 25% off sale! So by now I guess you’ll be paying me to take if off your hands – your prices have seen more cuts than a West End theatre production.
5)You love your boyfriend? That’s nice dear, let me know when your one week anniversary is.
6)No, no I do not want to save £5 on my next shopping bill excluding groceries, electricals and clothing.
7)Yes Blackberry I’m aware your battery is low, now stop flashing at me!
8)Students needing to be politically active and anti-government, shut up, you’ve never even voted.
9)False Nails – it’s not my business if you want to resemble a preying falcon but at least file the wedges down.
10)Congratulations you have 1000 followers on Twitter, I bet Britney Spears is lining up for advice from you on how to be famous.
11)So you’ve got a blog? And you write subtle, indirect, passive aggressive, pretenious, self-indulgent mumbo-jumbo? Congratulations, you’re a teenager.
12)Ooh, look at you with your Abba Gold and original artwork Fleetwood Mac album.
13)I get it, you hate your job – get another one, but …
14).. I’m aware there are no jobs around at the moment, refer to point 8!
15)If I put on a Southern accent and call my parents “Mar an’ Par” I can brand myself as a country singer y’all, this one’s for you Taylor.
16)I cn goo owt an get drunk evry wknd cous Im luvvin me lyf 2k12!
17)Aww, did you add that Lucida font to your glowy, sepia picture all by yourself?
18)Yes, I am aware I said I “Like” Madonna on Facebook, why are you such an insane stalker!?
19)I’m single because all men are dogs! I’m so jealous of people in a relationship sigh forever alone. I can’t live without my baby, you’re my world, some things never last.
20)If my call is important to you then answer me!
21)Taylor or Edward? Burn or Boil?
22)For some reason it’s become acceptable to put kids through ridiculous pressure such as beauty pageants, Britain’s Got Talent and Got to Dance in the hopes they’ll fulfil your childhood dream Mrs Mom!
23)If one more Red Cross person is really nice to me, leads me on, asks how old I am and then says sorry, you have to be 21, I will hit them. Not kidding.
24)Just a note to all you all-you-can-eat buffet staff, I would like to eat my food without you sitting on my lap, go away!
25)You look really nice today! Oh, you just threw that on? Way to throw my compliment back in my face, next time I won’t bother.
I hope you found what annoys me even remotely amusing, I’m just sitting here hating the world, should I even dare read it back?
Comment below with what annoys you or if you agree with me!
Until next time, hugs and kisses! Xoxo
Photo by Rennett Stowe