I’m pan-gender, how can I tell people?

Hi Wicid Nan,

I'm pan-gender and I don't know how to tell people without feeling embarrassed. Can you help me?


Hello pet,

It’s always best to share your concerns with someone else as you’ll usually find that you’re not the only one who has a worry or is feeling a bit lost.

Gender Identity is fortunately being spoken about more with some high-profile people such as Caitlyn Jenner and Laverne Cox discussing their journey as trans* women – people are beginning to understand that the way we look at gender is too small – because gender is not a ‘male’ and ‘female’ tick-box; it’s a sliding scale, or a spectrum.

Awareness of transgender issues is growing, but I understand your concern with coming out as pangender due to the lack of visible role models around you, and many people still do not know what pangender is? You may be asked some questions that make you feel awkward or embarrassed, but in those situations it’s important to remember that you do not have to answer or talk about anything you feel uncomfortable with, and people’s curiosity will pass fairly quickly.

My advice to you is to be yourself and as with anything if your friends are really your friends then they will support you and be understanding.

The Trans* Umbrella and the Genderbread Unicorn are very useful in explaining gender identity and terminology to people.

The Gender Trust contains a list of services and support organisations for Trans* and gender-variant people.

In the UK, we have something called the Equality Act 2010. This makes discrimination based on your age, disability, gender re-assignment, marriage and civil partnership, race, religion or belief, sex and sexual orientation illegal.  If you feel you have been discriminated against or have been the victim of a hate crime you can report it here.


If you ever feel you are in immediate danger then you should contact the Police by dialling 999 or by registering for emergencySMS. In a non-emergency you can report the incident by dialling 101.

Take care,
The Wicid Nan